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The BB&T Community Homeownership Incentive Program (CHIP) is income and credit based. Have a boyfriend is not related to the criteria. Maybe the loan officer was flirting. You could speak with another lender if you wish. The income based criteria does look at household income, but the key word is household, not boyfriend. They also require you to attend a home buyer education class. Have you done that?
The Lender should not be asking you if you have a boyfriend. My assumption is that the MD CHIP mortgage program has "household" income eligibility requirements. The Lender should be asking you if there will be anyone else living in the household with you over the age of 18 that earns income. I hope this helps!