The Grinch is Now Listing Homes

by Jamey MortonDecember 27, 2018

A Home That Grew Three Sizes in One Day

Do you enjoy the occasional three-decker sauerkraut and toadstool sandwich? Are you as charming as an eel? Do you have garlic in your soul? Better yet, is your soul an appalling dump heap overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, mangled up in tangled up knots? If so, if your heart could stand to grow by three sizes in just one day, then we just might have the listing for you.

You may be a mean one, Mr. Grinch — but would you buy a home where the Grinch is seen throughout all of the listing photos? Well, one clever real estate agent in Baltimore is betting that you would. They’ve decided to feature the holiday humbug throughout their listing photos for a home they’ve just listed – a three bed, three bath condo of over 2000 square feet, listed for $374,900. You may be a Grinch yourself, but would you buy your next home from the Grinch?

grinch house

A Home Built for Any of the Whos Down in Whoville

Maybe Christmas just isn’t your bag, and that’s fine. Maybe a rousing chorus of “Fah who doraze! Dah who doraze!” is the closest thing to torture that you can imagine. Or maybe you’re just the opposite. Maybe your heart has, through some past Christmas miracle, already grown three sizes in just one day.

Maybe Max and Cindy Lou have already somehow worked their Christmas magic on you. Either way, this three and three condo in the Baltimore neighborhood of Hampden, may be just right for you.

grinch house

Hampden is known for being a wonderfully unique town, and this fantastic refurbished home, complete with private parking and a completely finished basement, is your ticket to discovering why for yourself. It may not have moldy purple spots or be a crooked jockey that drives a crooked “hoss,” but with its modern conveniences and historic charm, it’s sure to put a little holiday spirit back in your life, no matter how big a Grinch you may be.

grinch house

A True Three and Three That Only a Grinch Could Love (or Sell)

This Baltimore, Maryland condo comes with exposed original brick; stainless steel appliances; a fantastic, nigh enviable amount of storage space for all your Christmas ornaments (or at least whatever you have left now that the Grinch as come through and left nothing but nails and bare wire on the walls); and two absolutely amazing porches that you can use to entertain holiday guests.

This home, Grinch notwithstanding, is just one block from “The Avenue,” and can give you the absolute best that the Hampden area has to offer. It has about as amazing a walk score, transit score, and bike score as any home in the greater Baltimore area. And, despite what the Grinch may have to say about it, is infused with a holiday spirit to rival that of any of the Whos down in Whoville.

grinch house

Christmas Day May Be in our Grasp as Long as We Have Hands to Clasp, and With 20% Down You Too Could Buy this Home From the Grinch

The listing features the Grinch in many of the photos, but a new home, like a well planned out Christmas gift, given from the heart, lasts forever. This holiday season, if you have the 20% down payment to gift the gift of a new home in Baltimore’s trending Hampden area, this might just be the home for you.

Set aside the fah who rahmus and dah who dahmus for another holiday season and make your heart grow by multiple sizes in just one day by giving the gift of a home for the holidays!

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About The Author
Jamey Morton
Jamey has been a writer since he discovered science fiction and fantasy in the fourth grade. His early love for all things strange and mysterious has translated into a passion for writing about haunted mansions and other intriguing topics related to real estate and homeownership. Jamey loves nothing more than finding a medieval castle in the middle of New Jersey or a chalet on the coast of Florida. When not researching otherworldly real estate, Jamey can be found writing his series of outer space horror novels in his home in Seattle.