Some people like to attach a “love letter” as part of their offer to buy a house, to try to set their bid apart from competitors'. However, the National Association of Realtors advises caution, citing the potential for fair housing issues.
Real estate agents themselves have mixed feelings on the topic.
Letters can make a connection with the seller
Some real estate agents acknowledge the concerns, but they say the right letter can still be helpful.
One way potential buyers try to win over a seller in a letter is by showing them how much they value certain features of the home. It could be the backyard view from the kitchen window, for example, or an unusual nook that might make for a cozy seating area. Highlighting these things can appeal to the sellers' emotions, because if they care a lot about them, they may appreciate a buyer who does, too.
Sharing something about themselves can endear a candidate to a seller, too. Ernie Chamberlain, an agent with George: A Real Estate Group, which is affiliated with the Hometown Realty brokerage in Richmond, Virginia, recalled a client who sent two photos of their dog to a seller. One photo was an “informal” picture of the dog, while the other was digitally altered to show the canine wearing a suit.
“It was the cutest photo. They ended up getting the house,” Chamberlain said, but "ultimately the best price and the best terms are what’s going to win.”
In plenty of cases, sellers aren’t going to act based on an emotional appeal. Lauren O’Brien, who lists homes for Leading Edge Real Estate in Reading, Massachusetts, recalled a client whose son was a police officer. The buyer knew the family and sent a letter emphasizing that he was a police officer, too. But he was offering $5,000 less for the house than a competitor, and the seller decided money was the key.
Letters can set you apart
A letter may help a buyer stand out from the competition, especially when there are multiple offers on a home.
Some buyers, knowing there will be multiple offers on the home, will send their bid and a letter as soon as possible.
If the seller receives the letter on a Friday and hasn’t planned to review offers until Sunday, the letter could help move that buyer’s offer to the front of the line, Chamberlain said. But it could land with a whimper if the seller reads the letter and then decides to wait and consider the other offers anyway, he said.
Letters raise fair housing concerns
If you opt to write a letter, consider carefully what you include. Identifying personal information about oneself or family can create a risk not only for the seller but also for the agent representing them. Letters may reference race, color, religion, sex, disability, familial status or ancestry, all of which are protected classes under federal fair housing law. It’s illegal for a seller to decide whom to sell their house to based on any of that information.
One state, Oregon, passed a law in 2021 to outlaw love letters to sellers because of these fair housing concerns, but the law was overturned on free speech grounds, according to the National Association of Realtors.
The NAR advises agents to educate buyer clients about fair housing and not to deliver it on their behalf. The organization noted in a website article that some agents suggest other ways to make buyers stand out, such as sharing their credit score or offering a nonrefundable deposit.
Chamberlain doesn’t encourage buyers to send letters, but he doesn’t discourage it, either. But he cautions them “not to put in personal photos or anything along those lines.” If he’s representing a seller, he urges them not to read buyers’ letters until they have decided whose offer to accept.
Love letters can do more harm than good, something Jamie Ferguson, an agent with Howard Perry and Walston Real Estate in Raleigh, North Carolina, tells her clients if they bring up writing a letter.
“I always say, there is a huge downfall for you if the letter doesn’t help you,” Ferguson said. “It could actually eliminate you, based on someone’s bias, and we never know who’s reading it.”